I was once in a relationship with someone who told me I “didn’t have the face” for short hair.
She told my friends — and me — that she was the prettier one in the relationship.
And after we had built three businesses together, she told me that I didn’t deserve the title of Co-Founder.
You might be saying, “Why on earth would you date someone like that?! You must have gotten rid of her after she showed her true colors.”
But I didn’t get rid of her.
In fact, when she proposed, I said yes to her.
Why? I didn’t think I could do any better. I didn’t feel worthy.
We need to talk about worthiness.
You know worthiness, right? It’s that feeling of being good enough. Feeling that you deserve to take up space.
Everyone (but women especially) is continuously exposed to messages that say we’re unworthy. We internalize these messages whether we want to or not, and they get lodged deep in our psyche.
Then those messages of unworthiness show up everywhere.
They make us think we need to lose 15 lbs before we look good enough.
They keep us from pushing for promotions or salary increases.
They keep us in bad relationships.
This struggle for worthiness also shows up in your business. It’s keeping you small, and it’s keeping you broke.
It takes anything you do to get new clients and makes it feel salesy. Note that I didn’t say – It makes it salesy. It makes it feel salesy.
It makes us say, “I need to follow up, but I don’t want to be annoying.”
It says, “There’s no way I can’t charge this much. Let me reduce that a bit.”
It says, “I don’t want my client to feel like I’m taking advantage of them.”
If we’re going to talk about getting new consulting clients, then we have to take a close look at worthiness.
It’s why I spend a full ⅓ of my SIGNED program on the elements of worthiness, shining a light on each so that you can build authentic, lasting confidence.
Because I can teach you how to raise your prices six ways from Sunday, but if you don’t think you deserve it, nothing I say will work.
If any of this resonated with you, ask yourself: Where is worthiness showing up in my life? Where is it showing up in my business?
And most important: Am I interested in making a change?
Take a moment to think about that. If you’d like, tell me what came to you.
So, what happened to that relationship? We called off the wedding three weeks before the date. Best decision ever.
And after taking time to fall in love with myself, I found my sense of self-worth. And I met my incredible, loving wife, who sees my worthiness. And our 1-year old son thinks I’m pretty great too.
To your success,