Why doesn't anyone think of me first?
Nobody thinks of you first because thinking of somebody first requires a category to think of them in, and a consultant who does almost anything doesn't occupy one. Human memory works by association. A problem shows up, it triggers a name, and that's the whole mechanism behind being recommended.
What being filed looks like
When someone in your network hears "we need help figuring out why our proposals keep stalling," a name arrives if they know somebody filed under that. If the closest match they have is a person who is good at a lot of things, no name arrives, and the conversation moves on. You were never rejected. You were never retrieved.
This is why the fix isn't working harder or being better. You can be the most capable person available and stay unretrieved, because capability and recall run on separate tracks. What gets you filed is saying one thing consistently for long enough that it sticks, which is the whole argument for picking a focus in the first place.
Is saying yes to everything hurting my referrals?
Saying yes to everything weakens your referrals, because a referral needs a trigger and a broad description doesn't give anyone one. This surprises consultants whose business was built on word of mouth, since the same openness that got them started is now the reason the flow feels random.
Think about what a referral requires from the person making it:
- They have to remember you at the exact moment a problem is being discussed.
- They have to be confident enough about what you do to attach your name to it.
- They have to be able to say it in one sentence to somebody else.
- They have to be right, because their credibility is on the line too.
A generalist description fails at all four. When people know who you work with specifically, they know who to send you, and the referrals arrive pre-qualified. If your referrals have been drying up, this is one of the causes worth checking before you conclude the problem is your network's size.
What does saying yes to everything cost besides referrals?
Saying yes to everything costs you predictability, marketing traction, and some of your best work. Consultants notice the referral problem first because it's visible, and the other three costs are the ones that make the year feel harder than the revenue suggests it should.
| What it looks like | What's underneath it |
|---|
| A random array of clients and projects | No stated focus, so whoever arrives next sets your year |
| Marketing that feels like shouting into the void | A message written for nobody in particular |
| A sales process that always needs pushing | Clients who can't tell you were built for their problem |
| Work you're not proud of | Engagements you took because they came, and not because they fit |
The tell I listen for is a sentence I hear often: I feel like I'm doing a lot of things and they're just not working. Several things can cause that, and an unnarrowed client focus is the most common one. The version consultants recognize instantly is being constantly busy while nothing new comes in.
There's an honest ending to this. Ask yourself whether you did your best work for the client you took on reluctantly. Almost nobody says yes, and that answer costs more than the fee was worth.
How do I become known for one thing without turning work away?
Become known for one thing by changing what you say in public and leaving what you accept alone, which is a smaller move than it sounds and takes about an afternoon to start. The message and the roster are two different systems, and only one of them has to narrow.
Here's the sequence I'd use:
- Pick the problem you want to be called about first. Choose from the work you'd take again, not from what you have most of.
- Write the sentence you want repeated when you're not in the room. One problem, one kind of client, no hedging.
- Put it everywhere your name appears, and use the same words each time. Consistency is what does the filing.
- Tell the ten people who refer you most, in a sentence. Most of them have no idea what to say about you now.
- Keep saying yes to whatever you want. Nobody is comparing your client list to your description, and carrying more than one client type on purpose is a real option.
Give that a year before you judge it, because consulting sales run for months and a focus needs a full cycle to show up in who arrives. What you're watching for is a change in the questions people bring you, and a client who opens with your exact problem is the signal that the filing worked.
Leah's take
I want to be clear that saying yes to everything was the right strategy once. In the early years you take the work, because taking the work is how you find out what you're good at and how you keep the lights on. Nobody should feel foolish about it. It worked, and then you outgrew it, and those are two different facts about the same habit.
What changes is the source of your clients. Early on they came from people who already knew you, and those people didn't need a category, because they had you. Growing past that means being found by people who have never met you, and strangers need a category. That's the whole shift, and it's why the thing that built your business is now the thing capping it.
The part I'd push back on gently is the word "nobody." Plenty of people think of you. They think of you as capable, and capable is not a category anyone searches for. When your contact is asked who's good at the specific thing, she reaches for the person she can describe in one sentence.
So give her the sentence. That's the work here. You don't have to turn down a single project, change your entity, or stop being the person who can handle almost anything. Say one thing, say it for a year, and let being thought of first be a consequence of being easy to describe.
